I was at work and decided to check in with Teenager Who Lives in the Basement (TWLITB).
I thought a nice text would be the best way to show my love.
Chicken: Hi TWLTIB, What’s Up?
TWLITB: Hey Chicken
TWLITB: Did u notice I brushed my teeth last night lol
Chicken: Ha. I did notice. Congrats.
TWLITB: lol my teeth are starting to hurt so now I’m brushing my teeth
Chicken: Great. Good news. Need to go to the dentist?
TWLITB: Y do I need to go to the dentist?
Chicken: No special reason besides YOUR TEETH HURT??
TWLITB: Its fine. Its only 1 tooth
Chicken: Oh, well, if it is only one tooth let’s just let it continue to decay into a deep dark cave of halitosis and someday, when you sleep with your mouth open, the flies attracted by the smell will be able to go spelunking in your cavity. Your mouth will be, like, a fly tourist attraction. Cool.
TWLITB: lol. Chicken, I went to the dentist like a week ago and nuthin was wrong…
Chicken: Yeah, a week ago in June, but hey, they are your teeth. I’m just trying to make sure you can still eat steak when you are 30. And not embarrass me at family reunions.
Chicken: And eat corn on the cob. And apples. Apple? Hey Apple……hey…Apple….hey apple….Apple…hey.
TWLITB: UR so gay
Chicken: Silly is a better word choice, Apple…
Chicken: Apple??? Hey. Apple?
Chicken: I’m blogging about this, TWLITB. It does not reflect well on your oral hygiene habits
TWLITB: UR so SILLY!!! happy?
Chicken: I love you Apple. I love you more than…pears.
Suffice it to say, oral hygiene has been a hot topic in our house for many a year. I’m waiting for the first girlfriend to let him in on the the secret survey stating that 10 out of 10 girls find a nice smile appealing. Get it? APP(le)? Peeling? Oh, never mind. I’m so gay. I mean silly. Here’s the link to Annoying Orange Annoys Apple if you are new here and wondering what the heck we are talking about.