I’ve told you stories about my family but I’ve never explained my family. This is because that’s complicated. But I’m feeling expansive tonight so what the heck, here goes. In short, it’s a big, messy, beautiful love story.
Let’s ease into it with this also familiar story line…
Here’s the story of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up three very lovely girls (and two boys)
All of them liked to fish and play cards like their mother
The youngest one was Mike
And here’s the story of a man named Butter
Who met the woman and her kids and fell in love
So they married and had my brother and became a happy family
(and here, folks, is where our story takes a hard left)
Until I showed up a few years later and ruined it for everyone
I hear I was a handful
First came divorce and then my father took my brother and me
To live with his Aunt who was about his age, don’t ask, it’s complicated
Who introduced him to another very lovely lady
Which is how I got my stepmom
My dad and she had three more kids, which made me almost the oldest
Except when I visited my mom and siblings
Where I metamorphosed into the baby (Gotta love me)
And that is why I often feel out of place
Because you can’t be almost oldest and simultaneously the youngest and be normal
Am I the bossy one, the spoiled one, the peacemaker?
How would I know?
I’m birth-order confused.
Then again, it’s sort of my super power. I’m highly adaptable.
I almost forgot to mention Tony, another lovely fellow
Who married my mom and become our Stepdad
It was a match made in heaven or at least the VFW
And finally we all lived happily ever after
Tony couldn’t have kids
But I forgot about the other father. The first father of this story.
He got married again, too, to Hazel
Another very lovely lady
And they had three lovely kids
This is crazy isn’t it?
It gets crazier.
Because my mother and Hazel, they became best friends
And that’s how I grew up with, essentially, 12 siblings, three fathers and three mothers, a bunch of German shepherds, a few generations of cats, and other assorted animals
Of course, three of those siblings were not actually related to me, it just seemed that way
It was siblinghood by proximity
Until I went through puberty and decided I liked one of them
Like “LIKE” liked. So we went out.
It didn’t last long.
But I had you going there for a minute, didn’t I?
And now you understand me